INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

One of the most common reasons people come to counselling is for relationship issues. Meaningful and satisfying relationships are a major determinant of happiness and general wellbeing. They are also essential to our identity, dictating how we relate to everyone we cross paths with, yet many people struggle to develop and maintain them.

HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS

Healthy relationships involve honesty, trust, respect and open communication and they take effort and compromise from all sides. People with close interpersonal relationships are more likely to have reduced levels of stress, depression and anxiety and will be more inclined to benefit from a sense of confidence, security and a feeling of belonging

In a healthy relationship people should respect each other’s independence. They should be able to make their own decisions without fear of retribution or retaliation and share decisions.

UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS 

Most of us have felt ourselves on the outside, feeling shy, anti-social and lonely at some point. Relationship difficulties are a normal part of our everyday lives. But if a relationship has been painful, damaging or unbalanced in the past, you might find it difficult to know how to manage things differently to avoid the same thing happening again in future ones. The signs that you are struggling with interpersonal relationships are numerous and can include:

·       Anger: you may find that you become angry more often. You may become frustrated as you struggle to find a way to communicate with others. This can be extremely damaging to relationships and to you.

·       Withdrawal: you may not feel inclined to socialise with friend, family, colleagues or loved ones.

·       Lack of confidence and a sense of alienation: you may feel you are not good enough to be in a relationship or that somehow you are different to other people.

·       Difficulty communicating: you may struggle to express yourself, both verbally and non-verbally, you may feel that you are often misunderstood or feel frustrated that you seem to say the wrong things.

·       Difficulty listening: you may find it difficult to listen properly to another’s needs, resulting in relationship conflicts and feelings of being distanced.

·       Lack of negotiation skills: you may lack the ability to negotiate with others to find a mutually agreeable outcome.

·       Isolation: you may feel isolated and lonely. How we interact with others and build interpersonal relationships is integral to our being able to feel accepted, attached and as though we belong. If you struggle with interpersonal relationships, you may feel that there is a void in your life.

CAN THERAPY HELP?

Yes. Making a relationship work is a skill and skills need to be learned. A happy relationship often requires a re-evaluation and re-focussing of efforts. Examining your past and present relationships in a non-judgemental, accepting environment, we can work together for you to gain a more balanced perspective on how you feel/react in different situations. You will begin to notice where things have gone wrong and recognise what you can do to start to build more constructive patterns in relationships, bringing you ultimately to a happier and more fulfilling life.